Common Fears With Dating Anxiety
Does dating make you feel nervous? If so, you’re far from alone – in fact, 1 out of 5 people feel nervous about relationships and the dating experience. Just some of the most dreaded things about dating included being ghosted – or suddenly ignored – by a potential partner, awkwardness around defining the boundaries of the relationship – the “what are we?” talk – and the influence of social media presence on modern relationships. For all people, these elements can be, and usually are, nerve-inducing.
What if you have dating anxiety, though? Dating anxiety is more than just the normal dating jitters – dating anxiety is an overwhelming, sometimes debilitating feeling around the process of dating. Dating anxiety can cause us to have physical symptoms, like a racing heart or sweating. It can also be a sign of unresolved relationship trauma, abandonment issues, or social anxiety disorder.
What are some common fears specific to dating anxiety? Check out just three below with an accompanying tip to overcome that fear, courtesy of Straight Up Treatment.
Fear of Rejection
Fear of rejection is common for many kinds of relationship-based anxieties, like social or relationship anxiety. Dating anxiety is no different; the fear of a potential or new partner rejecting us in the dating process is huge! This can cause us to edit and re-edit texts or dating profiles, over-analyze our conversations with potential partners, or even ghost people who are interested in us if we perceive they may ghost us first.
Getting over your fear of rejection is hard, but well worth the emotional work put into doing so. First, know it’s okay to feel fear of rejection – many of us do! The important thing is allowing ourselves to feel worried without allowing our worry to control us. Today, try to remind yourself – all feelings are meant to be felt; it’s our response to our feelings that we can control.
Fear of Putting Yourself Out There
Putting yourself out there means opening yourself up to others. This could look like opening yourself up for potential criticism – what if someone doesn’t like you, or doesn’t click? It could look like putting time and effort into getting to know someone, just for them to not pursue things further anyway. It could even look like allowing yourself to get close to someone just to lose them and feel heartbreak.
However, putting yourself out there also means you’re opening yourself up to joy. You’re allowing someone to learn about you – and potentially learn they like you! Opening yourself up and putting yourself out there doesn’t exclusively lead to disappointment – it can also (and often does) lead to some great experiences, new friends, and thriving relationships.
Fear of Heartbreak
We get it – nobody likes to feel hurt by someone they care about. Being rejected early on stings, but being rejected later in a relationship can really, really lead to some hurt feelings. For some, it may feel easier to never try dating at all to avoid the potential heartbreak of a relationship gone wrong.
To overcome your fear of heartbreak, be honest with yourself – what is the scary part for you? Are you scared of heartbreak, or are you scared of rejection? Criticism? Are you even more scared of things going right? Today, find some clarification on what the root is of your fear of heartbreak.
We hope this blog post educated you on some common fears associated with dating anxiety, along with a brief tip on how to overcome that fear! If you’d like to talk to someone about anxiety, we’ve got clinicians who can help. Whether you’d like to talk about dating anxiety, relationship anxiety, social anxiety, or something else, we’re here for you! Reach out today to meet a clinician to help you on your healing journey. We look forward to hearing from you!